Joe Queenan and My Beginnings

Yes, it’s been awhile–about six months–since my last post. During that time I’ve been doing absolutely nothing in the writing department. And, no, unlike the Hollywood types, I’m not on strike. I just felt like it was time for a break, which I expect will be over soon.

In any case, to paraphrase David Byrne of Talking heads fame, And you may ask yourself, who the heck is Joe Queenan? Well, according to our friends at Wikipedia he’s a satirist and writer and the author of nine books. He also writes for a variety of magazines and other publications, including a regular column in the Wall Street Journal called Moving Targets.

It’s about one of these recent columns that I bring him up here.

I Won’t Be Going on Any Cruise Ship With Millennials is it’s title, with the subtitle of Why would younger people want to share a holiday afloat with a bunch of retirees? I have my suspicions.

The column reads, in part, “The Wall Street Journal recently reported that millennials and Gen Xers are now storming the gangplanks and going on ocean cruises. Apparently, they are using their own money to pay for this. I find this development impossibly sad….Going on an ocean cruise while you are still in your 30s or 40s reminds me of Jerry Seinfeld’s famous comment about George Costanza’s sweatpants: Wearing sweatpants when you are not actually going to the gym is a sign that you have given up. Ocean cruises are the aquatic equivalent of sweatpants….But it’s not just the vexing issue of pre-geriatric lameness that concerns me here….Millennials have to know that there are European river cruises where medieval-era folk singers will be appearing night after night in showcases that should be called “Doom on the Danube” or “Terror on the Thames.” They have to know that there will be enervating lectures, irrelevant financial planning and has-been stand-up comics. The ship may not be large enough for you to get away from these people.”

Having set up his premise, Queenan then cuts to the chase…and to the reason for this blog post!

“Then an interesting thought occurred to me,” he goes on. “Millennials and Gen Xers quite accurately view baby boomers as their economic adversaries. Retirees like me are stifling the futures of younger generations with our extravagant Social Security benefits. Yet for some reason young people are enthusiastically signing up for cruises where they will be surrounded by the very cohort they have reason to despise. Why? Let’s just say ocean cruises offer a wonderful opportunity for millennials and Gen Xers to even up the generational score. There you are, out on the Lido Deck, all set to enjoy the Aurora Borealis, when without warning some vindictive millennial gives you a little nudge in the back. Splish! Splash! Man overboard!“

I find Queenan amusing but was kind of gobsmacked when I read this one since this is precisely the premise of my first Carina Quintana Murder Mysteries series novel, Late Boomer.

Published 11 years ago (!), Late Boomer sets Carina on the trail of the killer of several wealthy middle-aged Manhattanites—the baby boomers of the title—who have been gruesomely murdered.

Without providing too too much of a spoiler, let’s just say I beat Joe Queenan to his premise by more than a decade!

If you haven’t read it, get yourself a copy of Late Boomer and reflect on whether there’s anything to my, or Queenan’s, concerns about the younger cohorts.

As for Queenan, he concludes his column with, “Do I honestly think millennials would do such a cruel and devious thing? Well, I could hardly blame them. That’s why I’m keeping my eyes peeled for an all-expenses-paid family cruise invitation from my kids. I love you guys, but I don’t trust you.”

I suppose you’ll have to read Late Boomer to get a sense of mine!

Happy reading!